Disclaimer: This blog is written solely based on my own personal experience of losing fat by gaining mental strength via self love. It has nothing to do with food. There is no dieting involved, no tricks and no fads.
I'm just a chick who wants to help you become happier. I'm not selling you anything except a new way to think about yourself.
(And if I can do it, so can you!)
I often refer to life as female ninja training.
Because unlike male ninjas, female ninjas don't use weapons to make things happen, they use the strength of their minds. Yes, they often use manipulation and coercion of others to get what they want, but hey, that's the job they've been trained for. Point being, their awareness is so badass they can psychologically manhandle anyone.
And yours can be too, because the process of re-training your mind isn't hard. It just takes persistence, willpower, and faith.
Remember: The mind is mightier than the sword. If you want different results, the first step is always to take charge of your mind.
Alright let's do this!
It's imperative to believe this if you're really ready to change your size. Seriously, accepting this for myself has changed my life...not just my size.
Here's the truth: YOU ARE NOT WHAT YOU SAY YOU ARE!
If you think you're fat (and if you think fat is a bad thing), then you are bullying yourself.
If you believe the negative stuff other people say about you, try to understand that they are just a reflection of what you're already telling yourself.
Either way, ANY negative thought you say to yourself is completely UNTRUE.
Ugly, fat, flabby, stupid, boring...absolutely ANY 'thing' you tell yourself that makes you feel bad, or fat, simply is NOT true.
Forget about a slow metabolism, thyroid issues, and bad genes.
Now you may disagree with this, but could it at all be possible that you secretly want to maintain these reasons to use them as excuses for not being able to lose weight?
Just for now, let everything you think you know...go. You can pick up your old mindset again later, if you want, but just remember this: you can't lose weight if you think you can't lose weight.
Like you, I struggled with food my whole life.
No, I never had an eating disorder and I was never very large (5'4" tall and on average 135-140 lb).
But I still didn't look the way I wanted to look.
I even got checked for thyroid issues, but nope, normal levels there...so I settled for being big boned with a slow metabolism.
In high school I had my dieting experiments, but it always made me feel like I was about to collapse from lack of nutrition, and because I was an active person it just didn't suit my lifestyle.
(I honestly don't know how people can starve themselves and still function).
So for the most part I just carried on with life, not liking myself all that much and always comparing myself to others.
Even as a professional athlete in my twenties I had an extra layer that didn't seem like it was supposed to be there.
I looked in the mirror and always felt like it didn't truly represent me.
How could I train so hard and still not change my body?
I felt fit and strong...so why didn't I look that way?
And then, at 30, my fiancé suddenly left me after 7 years for another woman.
I was so devastated and embarrassed that I completely lost my appetite (pop-tarts were all I could manage to choke down).
Instead I cried and cried and cried...and wallowed in my sorrow.
I lost 10 pounds in a few weeks, and it was the easiest 10 pounds I had ever lost (at that point). But that's only because I couldn't eat.
An then, one day (about 2 months later), I decided enough was enough and the crying had to stop.
It was time to buck up and get it together.
And that's when I started to gain weight at an alarming rate, even though I wasn't doing anything differently (I promise).
I became more dumbfounded as the number on the scale continued to climb.
And then obsessed with it.
And with obsession comes dieting. So I diligently dieted and even hired a personal trainer I couldn't afford.
Even HE was dumbfounded when nothing changed.
I tried more diets, but I was so confused with what to eat and what to avoid that I became even more afraid of food than ever before.
Food was the enemy, and I promptly hated myself whenever I ate, no matter what I ate.
Food was the symbol for the pain and hurt I was bottling up, which means all that negative energy was locked inside of me.
And so it manifested itself as fat. And the weight gain continued.
One day I went on a lark and had a session with a clairvoyant (while on a trip to Hawaii to 'heal myself'), and she told me I had to 'let go'.
I was like; 'great, tell me how and I'll do it.'
Because what does 'let go' mean, really?
But that was all she had to say, so I was left to figure it out for myself.
And in a nutshell, it just means this: drop your story.
Don't even pinpoint what needs to stay and what needs to go, because (and trust me on this one)...IT ALL HAS TO GO.
Good thoughts, bad thoughts...it's all the same thing. Ego. And ego is based on fear, not love.
And if it's not God's love, it's fear.
You have to re-boot your brain, like when you erase your iPhone and set it back to as if you're turning it on for the very first time.
Read on and I'll show you how.
When you hate on yourself, you're energetically feeding yourself hate.
You are what you eat, right?
If you hate flabby thighs and think about flabby thighs whenever you eat, you get flabby thighs.
If you hate wrinkles and think about wrinkles when you drink alcohol, you get more wrinkles.
If you believe men don't think you're attractive or endearing, men will automatically run away from you.
So instead, you have to start feeding yourself love.
Do you know that saying; 'Energy flows where attention goes'?
Well it's spot on.
Begin to gently wish well on yourself by remembering you are not your mistakes.
Decide that you don't have to be a mess.
Release the idea that you're not worthy of love.
If you don't want to feel shame, pain, and guilt...you don't have to.
You have free will - so choose differently.
Dream a new reality while learning to love the one you're in (extra pounds and all).
Practice the art of forgiveness. (Don't overthink it. Just do it - everywhere with everyone. Especially with your 'self').
Look in the mirror and learn to see your 'self' in a new light. Lips, arms, eyes, legs, teeth...bit by bit and moment to moment.
Give yourself all the time in the world, because it's the moments that count. And there are A LOT of moments in just ONE SECOND. (Meditate on that one).
Choose new perspectives simply because they make you feel better.
ALLOW YOURSELF TO FEEL BETTER.
FOCUS ON BEING HAPPY INSTEAD OF NEEDING TO BE RIGHT.
I didn't change my diet at all.
I ate regular food and tried to be healthy, but I didn't obsess about it.
I just decided to enjoy food and see it as an ally.
Food is good. It gives life, energy, and oxygen to my mind, body, and spirit.
I was letting go of the self-hate, the layers of pain and guilt and misery from the break-up, from random teenage drama and who knows what else or where and how I got it. (Again, it doesn't matter...what matters is letting it all go).
I was feeling better and definitely lighter (yes in weight, but the power of lightness within your spirit is unbelievable).
I would look in the mirror and be like 'holy shit, I've totally lost weight!
So of course I'd feel even better and lighter.
Do you see how the change in rhythm of my thoughts began to change my body?
That's what it means to work from the inside-out...and to let go.
Life was becoming more enjoyable.
I started to dance.
I was slowly feeding my body love and joy.
I met some wonderful new people who helped to heal my relationship woes simply by being caring, loving, thoughtful friends.
I was finally learning what that crazy lady meant when she told me to "let go".
I wasn't perfect at it, but you'd be surprised how much a little bit goes a long way.
Just get focused, be consistent, and catch yourself whenever you start to go down the wrong (negative) path.
BE DILIGENT WITH YOUR THOUGHTS.
You have to be more aware of what you're thinking than anything else. While at your job, in your relationship, in the shower, while picking up your dog's poop, when waiting for the bus, at the dentist...get it?
It's been 4 years and I continue to maintain a number somewhere around 120lbs (scales are not important so I don't use them).
I've also met the man of my dreams and have manifested a bunch of other great stuff.
And I'm just getting started... ;)
So you see, it's not about the number.
It's not about the food.
It's all in your thoughts.
So if you want to change your body - start by changing your mind - and this will change your life.
P.S. What do you think? Can you share a similar experience or other helpful tips that changed your life for the better? Please let us know in the comments below!